Waiting for God – Chapter 4 – Just Say the Word

When God blessed me with the opportunity to serve as Emma Mae’s writing coach, I never expected He would use her to ignite my faith and free me from the chains of unforgiveness I thought I had broken and left behind me.

Though I believed I had forgiven the people who hurt me in the past, I allowed their behavior to hinder me from moving forward in Spirit-empowered courage and confidence. When I forgave them . . . with all my heart . . . God wrapped me in peace and assured me that He would not be wasting the heartaches.

When I remain focused on the Lord and tuned into His Word, I won’t be so worried about my reputation or bound by what others think about me. Spiritual growth requires the ebbing and flowing of surrendering our wills so we can submit to His authority.

I’m ready to praise the Lord as you share your comments or your answers to the reflection questions in the comment section below.

Reflection Questions

  1. Why is it hard to wait for God to handle our reputations when we’re feeling attacked?

When I feel like I’m under attack, it’s not easy to remember that God is working behind the scenes. The Lord is working all things out for the good of all who love Him. But I don’t always want to care about the “good of all who love Him” when I’m the one hurting and waiting for Him to work things out. If I keep focusing on my feelings, I won’t be able to release my grip on my desire for my definition of justice. But when I focus on Jesus, He will help me cling to what I know is truth‒Scripture‒and help me shrug off the lies I’m tempted to believe.

  1. What lies or opinions of others have you chosen to believe about yourself?

Someone told me that “no one would ever love me” and that I was “useless.” When I first heard the Gospel, I struggled with the thought of Jesus dying for me because He loved me.

 

  1. How can knowing what God says about us help increase our confidence and courage as we wait for Him to work in and through our situations?

When we read the Bible, God plants seeds of truth in our hearts and minds. The more time we spend with Him, the more we get to know and trust Him, the more we will understand He does not lie. Through our intimate relationship with Christ, the Holy Spirit can help us believe the unchanging words of Scripture. We can remember the God-breathed words of Scripture are God’s words, infallible and unchanging. Jesus is the Word and He is the same yesterday and today and forever. Hallelujah!

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To find out more about Emma Mae Jenkins, check out her Facebook page and her YouTube channel. You can read the article about Emma Mae’s response to being bullied on CBN.

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If you’re just joining the conversation and would like to share your thoughts on the previous chapters, I’ve posted the links below.

End-of-Chapter Questions

Chapter 1 – The Weight of Waiting

Chapter 2 – It’s Not All About Me

Chapter 3 – Holy Vision

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*** Thanks for joining me to discuss the Waiting for God end-of-chapter questions. Please remain focused on what God is doing in and through your life and refrain from sharing full names or personal information (yours or anyone else’s) so we can keep this blog family a safe place to share. All comments will be monitored and modified to maintain a loving and encouraging atmosphere that is glorifying to the Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. I look forward to growing with you.

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To order your copy of Waiting for God or to love your neighbor by ordering extra copies to share as gifts, please take a look at my book page.

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I look forward to having you join the conversation!

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Waiting for God – Chapter 3 – Holy Vision

When I met Diane, she was a newbie at a Christian writers’ conference. Her radiant smile made me forget my pain for a few seconds. Her contagious joy enthralled me. But her story . . . her story changed the way I thought about my attitude in the wait.

After she agreed to let me share a snippet of her story, I asked God to show me the verses He wanted me to study for the chapter message. The Lord changed my direction for the book as I studied Hannah’s story. He reminded me that my heart settled where my eyes landed. If I wanted to completely surrender my heart to the Lord, I needed to shift my focus.

I’m excited about the stories you’re going to share as we explore the life-transforming impact of Holy Vision.

Please share your comments or your answers to the reflection questions in the comment section below.

Reflection Questions

  1. How does focusing on the holiness of God increase our depth of trust in His motives and mercy?

To be holy is to be specially recognized as sacred, consecrated, entitled to worship. When I recognize God’s holiness, I can remember that He belongs first in my life. God deserves to feared (revered), honored and praised, as we stand in awe of His transcendent power and His intimate presence. He is reliable and trustworthy in every way, so He can be trusted to decide what’s best for me and everyone else. The Lord sees beyond what we can see and knows more than we’ll ever know, so we can count on His perfect will to encompass all we need and more.

  1. What aspects of God’s character affirm His reliability and feed our hope through the twists and turns we’ll encounter in the wait?

God is faithful, just, good, loving, eternal, and constantly present . . . God is with me! He is the way, the truth, and the life, not just one of the ways, or one of the truths, or one of the sources of life.

  1. What is God asking you to release your grip on this week?

I experienced a flare-up of nerve pain and muscle spasms in my back, shoulders, and neck while walking my service dog, Callie. She did a wonderful job caring for me until the pain became manageable enough for me to continue walking home. She stopped and leaned into me when I said, “Help Mama.” She remained still as I adjusted her leash and slowed her pace, stopping whenever I needed another break. My pain levels have increased since that day but are still less intense than they were before my last procedure. Praise the Lord!

Though I became discouraged when I missed a full day of work, the Lord reminded me that He is in control of my schedule. I can rest in the surety of God’s lovingkindness. I may not be able to work as fast as I used to work, but I’m always able to meet the deadlines God places before me. My mighty and merciful Father won’t allow the enemy to stop me from sharing His truth and love to the ends of the earth. Every time I say “yes” to a writing project or a speaking event, the Lord always comes through and gives me all I need to do all He places before me.

Hallelujah!

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I pray the Lord used Diane’s story in chapter three of Waiting for God to encourage you.

Today’s Featured Author, Diane Dokko Kim, has served over twenty-five years in local church leadership. In 2004, her first son was diagnosed with autism and ADHD/ADD at age two, which triggered profound personal, professional and spiritual crises. Since 2008, she has served as a disability ministry consultant, and launched an online ministry in 2012 for special-needs families. Diane and her husband, Eddie, live and serve in the heart of Silicon Valley with their two young sons. She blogs on being wrecked, redeemed and repurposed.

In Unbroken Faith, Diane comes alongside you as a fellow special-needs parent to help you reconcile the premise of a good God with the devastating realities of raising a disabled child. Kim’s biblically-based encouragement will help you understand that you are not alone, that God gets it, and that God’s Word is entirely relevant to the raw and messy yet hallowed spaces of special-needs parenting.

For an extended excerpt of Unbroken Faith, free resources, and more, please connect with Diane on her website.

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If you’re just joining the conversation today, you may want to drop in and share your thoughts for Chapters 1-2.

End-of-Chapter Questions

Chapter 1 – The Weight of Waiting

Chapter 2 – It’s Not All About Me

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Thanks for joining me to discuss the Waiting for God end-of-chapter questions. Please remain focused on what God is doing in and through your life and refrain from sharing full names or personal information (yours or anyone else’s) so we can keep this blog family a safe place to share. All comments will be monitored and modified to maintain a loving and encouraging atmosphere that is glorifying to the Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. I look forward to growing with you.

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Waiting for God – Chapter 2 – It’s Not All About Me

Looking in the mirror can force us to see things we’d like to ignore . . . like our need for growth.

When I wrote chapter two of Waiting for God, I had to do some serious soul-searching. It wasn’t easy to admit my impatience or pride. But I felt a weight lifting when I decided to stop trying to control my life and the lives of those I loved. I didn’t have to do God’s job. Whew! What a relief!

I can hardly wait to hear what the Lord showed you during today’s reading.

Please share your comments or your answers to the reflection questions in the comment section below.

Reflection Questions

  1. How can considering how closely our lives are intertwined with the lives of others help change our perspective regarding trials and the time we spend in the wait?

When I’m struggling with relational conflicts, it helps me to remember that “God’s sovereignty and power cannot be thwarted by the actions or attitudes of the people He created” (Waiting for God, p. 15). But when I’m wrestling with private and personal affliction, the Lord helps me remember He’s not wasting the heartaches or pain. As I trust in Him and share the ways He’s working in and through my trials, He can use my mess to encourage others who are suffering . . . others who are looking for a purpose in the pain and hope in the wait. When I hear how He’s working in the lives of others, their testimonies ignite my faith, too.

 

  1. Why is it often tempting to ask God to change others quickly instead of focusing on the ways we need to change and accepting the time required to make those changes stick?

It’s so much easier to point out where others are needing growth. When someone hurts me, I don’t want to explore how I contributed to the issues. Looking into that mirror, facing my ugly or immature attitudes, and opening myself to the painful process of pruning can be scary. Growth takes time. Bad habits are hard to break. Sinful perspectives are difficult to face and even harder to surrender into God’s pruning hands. But when I remember God’s love for me results in His desire to make me more like Him, I have to trust He knows what He’s doing . . . even when the process hurts and seems endless.

 

  1. How has the Lord used the time you’ve spent in the wait to help prepare you for something you never expected?

Wow! When I picked up that piece of paper in September 2012 and dropped to the floor writhing in pain, I never expected the difficult road ahead and a life of chronic pain and fatigue would lead to ministry opportunities.

As I share how the Lord has held me close and changed me through this painful and ongoing healing journey, I’m in awe at how He uses each moment to point to His unfailing love and grace, to prove His unending faithfulness, to demonstrate His unlimited power, and bring comfort through His enduring hope.

Writing this book‒Waiting for God: Trusting Daily in God’s Plan and Pace‒has been a part of my healing process. Even when my current pain, fears, or frustration levels tempted me to feel alone, forgotten, and hopeless, God used the people I interviewed to help me hold on to His promises, to know what He says is true.

I expected Waiting for God to be a devotional about persevering through suffering. But by the time I wrote the last chapter, God showed me so much more . . . so much more.

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If you’re just joining the conversation today, you may want to drop in and share your thoughts for chapter 1.

*** Thanks for joining me to discuss the Waiting for God end-of-chapter questions. Please remain focused on what God is doing in and through your life and refrain from sharing full names or personal information (yours or anyone else’s) so we can keep this blog family a safe place to share. All comments will be monitored and modified to maintain a loving and encouraging atmosphere that is glorifying to the Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. I look forward to growing with you.

 

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Waiting for God – Chapter 1 – The Weight of Waiting

Welcome to the Waiting for God online discussion!

I started reading Waiting for God so I could seek the Lord with you. I know the Lord gave me the words to share with you, but He’s also using each chapter to remind me how much I need Him, how much I need His daily reminders, how much I need fellowship with His people.

In chapter one I shared a little bit about my healing journey. As I read the chapter today, I struggled with pain management and fatigue. Discouragement snuck up on me.

As my heart became “heavy from the weight of waiting,” the Lord lifted my chin and reminded me to look toward His unchanging and infallible Word.

I look forward to hearing what He revealed to you as you read through chapter one of Waiting for God. Please share your comments or your answers to the reflection questions in the comment section below.

Reflection Questions

1. How does remembering that God’s Word is eternal help us trust Him when our wait feels endless?

Though my life and my seemingly endless seasons of waiting are just blips on the radar of eternity, God’s Word was and is and always will be the same. So, when I’m weighed down by my ever-fluctuating circumstances or emotions, I can trust God’s unchanging truth will always be enough for me to stand firm no matter how long I have to wait for Him.

2. Return to Psalm 119 and read verses 92–93. How can delighting in God’s law preserve our lives and keep us from perishing in our affliction?

To delight in God’s law means to be content, satisfied, and joyful in the safety net of God’s loving commands, which are intended to guide us, secure us, and keep us walking and waiting with surefooted confidence in the center of His perfect will.

3. Which verses from the Bible help you focus on God’s power, love, and faithfulness instead of on the burdens in your personal walk through the wait?

There are so many verses that I run to when I need a reminder of God’s power, love, and faithfulness. However, the Lord anchors me to hope when I read Psalm 3:4-5 (NIV):

“I call out to the LORD, and he answers me from his holy mountain. I lie down and sleep; I wake again because the LORD sustains me.”

These verses remind me that the Lord Almighty always hears me, cares for me, and watches over me as I rest in the surety of His all-sustaining power and constant presence.

 

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I’m looking forward to hearing how the Lord is working in your life. Please share your answers to the Chapter 1 questions below.

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***Join the Chapter 2 Discussion***

*** Thanks for joining me to discuss the Waiting for God end-of-chapter questions. Please remain focused on what God is doing in and through your life and refrain from sharing full names or personal information (yours or anyone else’s) so we can keep this blog family a safe place to share. All comments will be monitored and modified to maintain a loving and encouraging atmosphere that is glorifying to the Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. I look forward to growing with you.

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Waiting for God – Welcome and Book Giveaway!

Some of you may notice my website looks different.

I’d like to thank Juanita Johnson for sponsoring the makeover and Marty Longe from Umbrella Graphics for working with me to create the new design.

Now that the brand-new website has been launched, I’ll be adding a quarterly newsletter that will include exclusive giveaway opportunities, ministry updates, and new content.

On September 25, 2019, I’ll return to sending you weekly encouragement and prayers.

But from August 19, 2019 to September 20, 2019, we’re going to rejoice in the Lord as we discuss the end-of-chapter questions on my blog.

Those who join the conversation and share their answers in the comment section under the daily posts will be included in the weekly giveaways.

“Together, we will inhale the truth of Scripture, exhale prayers of honesty and belief, and find rest in God’s enduring love . . . all while we’re still waiting and trusting daily in His plan and pace.” (Waiting for God, p. 7)

— Book Giveaway —

I’m grateful for every person who participated in last week’s book giveaway by leaving a comment or emailing encouraging notes.

Rebecca Grabill will receive the signed copy of Waiting for God: Trusting Daily in God’s Plan and Pace with a free tote.

But to thank you for being a member of my blog family and to welcome new subscribers as we celebrate the release of Waiting for God, I’m also offering a FREE prayer book.

Please take a moment to download Wait Like a Warrior: 1-Minute Prayers to Refresh Your Spirit When the Wait Feels Endless (pdf) from the FREE GIFT section on my Homepage.

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If you know someone who will be encouraged by reading Waiting for God and joining our blog family, please invite them to subscribe today.

I look forward to growing with you!

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Praise, Updates, and Waiting for God Book Giveaway

Waiting for God - Callie at ODB - Aug 7, 2019“My heart rejoices in the LORD; in the LORD my horn is lifted high. My mouth boasts over my enemies, for I delight in your deliverance. There is no one holy like the LORD; there is no one besides you; there is no Rock like our God.” 1 Samuel 2:1-2 (NIV)

So much has happened since I’ve the last time we met here, Blog Family.

I’ve wrestled with God and my jumbled emotions through prayer after my doctor said, “This could be your life. Pain management may be all we can do.”

I pouted with pity-party sobs and praised Jesus from wah-wah-whining to worship-filled tears as He lifted my eyes toward hope and breathed a little faith into my prayers.

My last test procedure intended to help manage my severe back, neck, and shoulder pain worked better than my doctor expected, so we submitted a request to the insurance. In hopes of a successful treatment, I planned to enroll Callie into the service dog training program with Jacob Guell at Tails for Life.

Within weeks, reality dashed my high hopes.

The insurance refused to pay for the procedure that had given me more pain relief than any other procedure I endured over the last seven years. The treatment fell under what they dubbed as experimental. So, I would have to pay out of pocket.

Imagining six-figure bills in my mind, I feared calling to find out how much the procedure would cost.

To my delight, the money we’d earmarked for Callie’s training would cover the costs. Hallelujah!

But I would not be able to pay for Callie’s program with Tails for Life.

Disappointment stirred in my heart as I surrendered the situation to the Lord and called to cancel Callie’s training. But Jake encouraged me to consider a fundraiser.

I requested help through my blog and social media on May 26, 2019.

Within four days, sponsors paid for Callie’s training in full.

 Thank You, Jesus!

I’d like to give a shout-out to the generous sponsors who have joined me as ministry partners by investing in Callie’s service training.

Callie started training at Tails for Life on July 9, 2019 and she already did a fabulous job at her first official ministry event.

On Wednesday, August 7, 2019, we celebrated the release of Waiting for God: Trusting Daily in God’s Plan and Pace and shared a message at the Our Daily Bread Ministries chapel.

You can join us for worship and watch the video at Behold: The Power of Living with Holy Vision (Facebook).

MEME - Waiting for God Available Now - Love Neighbor - Aug 7, 2019Through this awesome launch party and the help of my wonderful group of Praying-Peeps who have shared Waiting for God online and through in-person encounters, the Lord has been placing copies of Waiting for God into the hands of readers.

God’s wonderful people have pre-ordered so many books that Amazon was out of stock the day after we launched the Waiting for God!

And at 4 pm on August 11th (four days after our release date), Amazon posted this message under Waiting for God: Only 16 copies in stock (more on the way).

Thank You, Lord!

Please join me in spreading the word about Waiting for God so that Amazon will place multiple orders for more books.

Waiting for God is also available at Barnes and Noble, ChristianBook, and Discovery House Publishers.

And you can bless this writer by leaving a review of Waiting for God on one or more of these sites. Reviews make a difference!

Rejoice! Rejoice! Rejoice in the Lord! The good news is not over.

 I’m excited to announce that I’ve been working with a talented designer who has given my website a makeover. After the reveal, scheduled for next week, this website will look different . . . better . . . and be easier to navigate!

Current subscribers will continue automatically receiving new posts and will be invited to request the free gift I’m offering new subscribers.

I’ll be posting new encouragement devotions and prayers weekly and will add a quarterly newsletter that will include exciting updates, upcoming events, and exclusive new projects that will not be available online.

For the first thirty-three days after we reveal the new website, I’ll release behind-the-scenes stories, photos, and reader testimonies as I share my answers to the end-of-chapter questions and invite you to join the conversation.

Subscribers will receive special invitations during this celebration month to participate in fun giveaway opportunities exclusively designed to show my appreciation for you‒my blog family.

In my next post, I’ll invite you to return to this cyber-spot and explore the new website.

I hope you’ll join me for the adventure as we rejoice with Spirit-empowered courage and confidence while Waiting for God: Trusting Daily in God’s Plan and Pace.

 But today, I want to thank you for being a part of my blog family.

BOOK GIVEAWAY: I’m giving away one copy of Waiting for God to one person in the continental U.S. on Wednesday, August 14, 2019 at 8 p.m. (CST).

To participate in this giveaway, leave a comment under this blog post. I’d love to hear more about your waiting season so we can pray together as we trust daily in God’s plan and pace.

I’ll randomly choose one person who lives in the continental United States to receive a signed copy of Waiting for God: Trusting Daily in God’s Plan and Pace.

Even if you already have a copy or have already ordered copies of Waiting for God, don’t worry.

After reading a few chapters of Waiting for God, some readers have emailed me to let me know they are loving their neighbors by ordering extra copies to give as gifts.

 To God be the glory, the honor, and the praise, praise, praise!

I’m looking forward to growing with you!

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Congratulations, Rebecca Grabill! I’m looking forward to sending you a signed copy of Waiting for God: Trusting Daily in God’s Plan and Pace. Please email me your mailing address.

I appreciate everyone who took time to leave a comment. I’ll be sharing more giveaway opportunities soon!

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Callie the Service Dog: Asking for Help

Callie pic 1*** Thanks to the generous support of God’s loving people, Callie’s service dog training was sponsored in full in less than four days. to God be the glory, the honor, and the praise, praise, praise! To join the adventure as I share how the Lord is working in and through our journey, please join us on our Facebook page: Callie the Service Dog with Xochitl E. Dixon.

Original Post Below:

When we followed God from California to Wisconsin after a university offered my husband a job he’d never even applied for, a part of me thought the Lord was leading me to doctors who would be able to fix my injured back. I’d grown weary of struggling with pain management and fatigue.

I knew God could heal me instantly and thought our move would be one step closer to our miracle.

I was wrong, but oh so right.

The day after I arrived in Wisconsin, our first Fondy friends, Gary and Carmen, drove us to pick up our new puppy.

Callie Puppy Pic by WindowAs we stood in the middle of the animal rescue center, I held the bundle of wiggles in my arms and cried.

My back, shoulders, and neck hurt, but the pain couldn’t take my joy away.

I had no idea that small pup would change my life. And at that time, I had no idea how much I needed her.

In the months after adopting Callie, I struggled with adjusting to life in Wisconsin.

Alone and freezing, with pain levels increasing and writing deadlines quickly approaching, I battled discouragement daily.

We invested in personal and group training for Callie. She grew fast and soon doubled the estimated weight the rescue center had given us, though she seemed to think she still weighed twelve pounds.

Callie pic 13Yes, that is my puppy perched on my shoulder.

After my last procedure failed to improve my pain management, my doctor said, “This could be your life. Pain management may be the only thing we can offer.”

His words punched me in the gut.

I knew God could heal me in an instant. I had no idea why He hadn’t, but I knew He also hadn’t wasted one moment of my healing journey.

I share a lot about that topic and about my initial injury in my first full-length devotional, Waiting for God: Trusting Daily in God’s Plan and Pace (Available for pre-order on Amazon and on the Discovery House Publishers’ website).

My doctor consoled me as I grieved. Then, we discussed other treatment options, options that would still be considered pain management, band-aids for the symptoms of the injury no doctor seemed to be able to fix.

I spent the next few days crying and praying and resting in God’s loving arms, grieving but at peace.

My husband did all he could to encourage me.

20181109_102616But the Lord used Callie to make me smile, to help me get up and walk even when the pain felt overwhelming and the temperatures reached smack-me-in-the-face cold.

I taught Callie how to walk on the treadmill, so she would still get exercise when my body refused to cooperate.

But most days, her smile enticed me to walk with her. Yes. I even walked her in the snow.

As the months rolled by, I got stronger, physically and emotionally.

Even when the pain levels peaked, my sweet pup managed to tuck a little joy into my weary heart.

Callie pic 4Her smile brightened my darkest days and gave me the courage to research a possibility I thought would be out of my reach.

Could I find someone to help me train Callie to be a service dog? How much would it cost? How could we afford it if I had to pay for my next procedure because the insurance company refused to cover the expenses?

I needed help.

After much prayer, wise counsel, and encouragement from friends who had supported me during my decades-long healing journey, I asked God for the courage to ask for help.

Our current trainer recommended Jake Guel from Tails for Life.

Callie Oct 2018After hearing my story, he said we could train Callie to help me walk without a cane, a task she’s been practicing. She could learn how to lean into me when I lose balance during a spasm or when my nerve pain flares-up while walking. She can learn how to pick things up for me, how to retrieve items, and more.

On my hardest days, I am hunched over and wincing from the pain as I make my way to the bathroom.

The thought of having Callie as a helper makes me feel less alone, less dependent on my hard-working husband who already does so much for me.

I feel stronger, braver . . . even when I feel weakened by the ongoing sharp pain and headaches . . . like today.

She would be able to travel with me if I take public transportation, since I can’t drive.

Callie pic 5She’ll be able to travel with me and stay with me at hotels, so I can follow God’s leading with confidence as He expands my speaking ministry.

Jake offered me a training package that was more affordable than I imagined, but still way out of my budget.

He suggested I reach out to people who would be willing to sponsor Callie’s service dog training.

So, here I am. Risking rejection and ridicule as I ask for help to raise $3,200.00 for Callie’s service dog training.

I’m trusting God will provide in a mighty way. We hope to raise enough money so we can sign up for a training session in June.

Callie - Graduation Photo - April 2019If you’re willing to join our adventure as a sponsor, please visit the Tails for Life website and donate a tax-deductible gift.

Please make a note on your donation stating that you are sponsoring Callie Dixon.

If you are not able to, for some reason, please make sure you email Jake at [email protected] to let him know you are sponsoring Callie Dixon’s training. If it’s easier, you can email me so I can let him know.

I will be asking for donations for a week. I need to secure Callie’s spot. The training schedule fills up quickly.

If you let me know when you donate, I can keep a record to compare to Jake’s list of sponsors. This will help ensure that our sponsors’ gifts are applied toward Callie’s service dog training.

I will post occasional updates about how God is working in and through our adventures on my blog. I’ll also be creating pages on Facebook and Instagram just for Callie the Service Dog, where I’ll post photos, videos, and share what the Lord is teaching me through our journey.

Thanks for your prayers, your encouragement, and your willingness to consider sponsoring Callie as she begins service dog training.

Callie pic 2I know I can do nothing without God or your ongoing love and support.

To God be the glory, the honor, and the praise!

If you want to learn more about Jake Guell and the wonderful ways they are helping change lives, please visit the Tails for Life website.

You can also encourage them by “liking” their Facebook page and following them on Instagram.

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Because Jesus Lives . . . for Us!

Blog - Because Jesus Lives for Us - John 20 v 31 - April 21, 2019Suggested Reading: John 19-20

Stilled by a bout with sickness, I sat on the sidelines as folks prepared fancy Easter outfits and meals, stuffed colorful baskets with gifts and goodies, and planned fun activities for children.

Spring suits and dresses.

Egg hunts and family photos.

This year, all of our traditions remained packed in totes.

The scenery on Easter Sunday didn’t look the same in Wisconsin.

I missed the sunny weather and the fragrant flowers decorating our California back yard.

I missed the laughter as our sons searched for candy and cash stashed in plastic eggs ruthlessly hidden in the nooks and crannies of our two-story home.

Sadness tugged on my heart and nudged me into a full-blown pity-party. I nursed my cold and waved as my husband headed to church.

I wanted to go with him. I wanted to spend Easter with our sons. I wanted to have more energy, less pain, more laughter, less grief, more blessings, less trials.

Discontent didn’t make a cute Easter outfit, so I repented.

As I settled in to watch the live-stream video of the service, the Lord tugged my focus to a different place, a quiet place, a sobering place . . . at the foot of the cross.

Betrayed and abandoned, mocked and rejected, Jesus stood silently before His raging accusers, and endured torture (John 19:1-17). As He hung on the cross, Jesus provided for His mother (John 19:25-27).

I am a face in the crowd along with Jesus’s mother, covered by a cloak of Christ’s unending compassion.

As God in the Flesh experienced excruciating physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual pain, He thought of those He loved before the beginning of time.

He thought of . . . me.

But how often do I think of Him?

Do I ever stop “wanting something else” long enough to consider the weight of the cross on Jesus’s wounded back?

Do I think of the pain caused when the soldiers struck Jesus across the face, when they flogged Him with barbed and splintered weapons?

The punishment I deserve was heaped onto Jesus, the only one who can ever claim innocence.

God in the Flesh allowed the soldiers to ridicule and abuse Him, tearing into His flesh and His heart as they beat Him . . . instead of me.

Do I live like I know the value of each moment the Messiah stood silently, bleeding as mockers spit in His face, accepting the cruel sentence meant for me?

Do I stand in awe of Christ’s holiness as He restrained His limitless power and willingly accepted each blow so that the God-breathed words of Scripture would be fulfilled . . . simply because He loved . . . loves me?

The blood-stained cross, of Christ’s nail-pierced wounds and heart-wrenching cries to the Father, came at a great cost . . . yet, I pay nothing.

Do I “look on the one they have pierced” (John 19:37) with iron nails as the jagged splinters of the cross pressed against the deep-wounds stinging His flesh?

Do I consider the price Jesus paid when chose to take on my sins and be separated from the Father, accepting death and being left in a dark tomb that was truly meant for me?

Do I truly rejoice in the gift of the empty tomb as I proclaim Christ as the Risen King (John 20) who lives to give life-transforming love to the rejected, the forgotten, the marginalized, the doubters, and the worst of sinners . . . like me?

As I read through the gospel of John, do I remember that each word is written that we “may believe that Jesus is the Messiah, the Son of God,” and that by believing we may have “life in His name” (John 20:30-31)?

Today, I didn’t feel well. I struggled with pain and fatigue. I became frustrated with the symptoms of my cold and discouraged because I can’t take medication for cold symptoms. But by God’s incredible grace, I celebrated Easter with my heart focused on the foot of the cross.

As we consider the cost of Jesus’s personal sacrifice, we can learn to appreciate the value of the blood He shed and embrace the sobering reality that comes with believing that Jesus died and rose and lives for us.

Oh, what a gift it is to be loved so much . . . by God!

When Jesus made His way to the cross . . . He thought of us.

When Jesus died on that cross . . . He thought of us.

When Jesus rose after three days in that tomb . . . He thought of us.

Jesus thought of us when He promised to send us the Wise Counselor, His Spirit who would reveal His truth to us and empower us to live for Him and share Him with others (John 20:19-22).

God in the Flesh, the Second Person in the Trinity, Jesus thought of us . . . Jesus thinks of us.

No matter what we’re facing in life, we can rise up in victory, walk in power, move forward in hope, and breathe faith-filled prayers with confidence, because . . . Jesus lives . . . for us.

Hallelujah!

Lord Jesus, we love You and praise You and thank You for the unchanging truth that changes us and gives us an eternal perspective through which we can view the situations we face each day. Oh, how easily we can brush aside Your priceless love when we get consumed with our busyness, when we get overwhelmed by our selfishness, when we get lost in the mess of our fleshly discontent that tempts us to desire something more or something else. Thank You for coming to save us, for dying for us, for living for us. Please help us to receive Your intimate love, to be forever transformed and empowered by Your constant presence as we live in the shadow of the Good News . . . forever freed and victorious in You. In Jesus’s name, Amen.

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How does your perspective on trials and triumphs change when you know that Jesus thought of you when He died for you and rose for you, that Jesus thinks of you every moment of every day?

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J9379To pre-order your copy of Waiting for God: Trusting Daily in God’s Plan and Pace today, please visit my Amazon Author Page. We’ll be going through the daily devotions on this blog after the book releases on August 7, 2019. I look forward to growing with you!

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Waiting for God Pre-Order Party

Waiting for God - Pre-Order Announcement 1 - 2019My first full-length devotional, Waiting for God: Trusting Daily in God’s Plan and Pace, is available for Pre-Order on Amazon!

To God be the glory, the honor, and the praise, praise, praise!

I used to be toe-tapping impatient when standing in lines. I would get irritated when I made a phone call and was left on hold. My inability to embrace the act of waiting when juggling life’s small frustrations became more evident when I faced heart-wrenching delays.

Waiting was not a welcome part of my life, especially when the wait was accompanied by physical or emotional pain.

When I first surrendered my life to Jesus, a friend warned me not to pray for patience. So what was I supposed to do? How was I going to deal with the inevitable waiting seasons in life if I couldn’t be honest and ask God for help?

After my battle with chronic pain became overwhelming, I longed for comfort, for peace, for revitalized strength and realized patience has nothing to do with trusting God in the wait.

Patience requires us to suppress rather than process feelings and is reliant on our ability to control our actions and attitudes in our own strength.

Over the years, I’ve learned the futility of self-help and will-power.

So, instead of trying harder, I admitted my weaknesses.

Sick of being burdened by anxious thoughts and tired of feeling stuck, I cried out to God. With Spirit-empowered strength, I looked for Bible verses to help me trust the Lord when the wait felt endless. I reflected on how other faith-warriors leaned on God while facing difficult situations.

My search for enduring hope revealed unexpected answers.

I didn’t need more patience. I needed a new perspective on the Maker of Time’s purpose of waiting.

As I inhaled God’s Word, I exhaled in prayer and experienced the power of resting in God’s love.

Now, I have the privilege of sharing my journey with you.

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J9379What others are saying about Waiting for God?

“If your heart is weary and longing for answers—for healing, for provision, for miracles—Waiting for God renews your hope with strong biblical truth and encouraging Scripture-based prayer.

Conquer your fears and frustrations as you inhale God’s Word, exhale in prayer, and rest in God’s love. Live a life of deeper connection and immediate communion with God that can lead to contentment in His constant presence, no matter what your days hold or how long God’s deliberate delays may last.

Xochitl Dixon writes each chapter with heart-touching transparency and vulnerability, as she shares her own story as well as the stories of others who are trusting God through waiting seasons with no apparent end in sight. As a woman who lives with chronic pain, Xochitl understands constant struggle yet chooses to put God on the throne of her life.”

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Waiting for God: Trusting Daily in God’s Plan and Pace is available for pre-order on Amazon and scheduled for release on August 7, 2019.

I’m looking for readers willing to join me for this pre-order party and to prayerfully consider reading through one chapter a day with me after the book is released.

I’ll be offering exclusive giveaways to readers who join the conversation as we discuss the end-of-chapter reflection questions, which are designed for personal and group study.

Please take a moment to follow my Amazon Author Page and pre-order your copy of Waiting for God: Trusting Daily in God’s Plan and Pace.

Please also leave a comment below to share how I can pray with you as you continue waiting for God and trusting daily in His plan and pace . . . one breath at a time.

I look forward to growing with you!

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S.P.R.A.W.L. Before the Lord

MEME - Blog - S.P.R.A.W.L. Before the Lord - Jan 14, 2019Suggested Reading: Genesis 24

As a teenage runaway, I convinced myself that survival made it necessary to place my needs above everyone else’s.

I demanded my way, dug in my heels until I proved myself right, and prided myself in being independent.

I gave to no one. I insisted I needed no one. I submitted to no one.

I trusted no one.

After repeatedly falling face-first in the mess caused by my foolishness and self-centered sinfulness, I met a King‒Jesus‒who proved Himself trustworthy.

Prayerfully reading through the Bible yearly helped me learn more about God’s character as I discovered how much my personal Lord and Savior loved me, how much He gave for me, how much He promises me.

I began to realize He was and is and always will be the only One worth following.

Falling in love with Jesus changed my perspective on servanthood.

But how could I learn to follow Christ when every fiber in my being still struggled with stubbornness at times?

How could I possibly hear His direction when a war waged between my self-serving heart and my desire to have a surrendered servant’s heart?

Though the concept of surrender filled me with fear, the Lord used a humble servant in Genesis 24 to help me learn to S.P.R.A.W.L. before my trustworthy Master, Jesus Christ.

S.P.R.A.W.L.

Stop.

Pray.

Release.

Acknowledge.

Watch.

Listen.

When Abraham sent his servant to seek out a wife for Isaac, the servant fretted over his ability to complete the task (Genesis 24:1-9). Abraham assured him that he Lord would be with him and equipped with all he needed for his travels (vv. 10-11). Scripture doesn’t tell us how much time passed when the servant arrived in Nahor, but we do know how he spent his time.

He stopped and prayed (vv. 12-14).

He released his worries into God’s able hands.

He acknowledged God’s love and reliability with a simple statement of assurance:

“By this I shall know that you have shown steadfast love for my master.” (v. 14, emphasis mine)

Through his honest and confident prayer, the servant opened his heart to the peace of trusting God with the outcome (vv. 15-21).

He watched with expectancy as he waited for God’s answer (v. 33).

And even when others tried to distract him from his purpose and delay him, the servant listened‒obeyed his master‒followed the Lord and started on his journey home (vv. 34-61).

This nameless servant chose to S.P.R.A.W.L. before the Lord when given a seemingly impossible task and became a vital part of God’s plan in bringing Isaac and Rebekah together (vv. 62-67).

The Lord never leaves us empty-handed when He calls us to follow Him.

When the twists and turns in our journey test us and the delays and distractions discourage us, we can still follow our Master with surety and hope.

As we S.P.R.A.W.L. like a servant before the Lord Almighty, He can use us to make an eternal impact in someone else’s life.

 Lord Almighty, thanks for affirming Your unending love for us as You empower us to S.P.R.A.W.L. before You whenever we face challenges.

Give us wisdom to stop when we need guidance, pray with confidence, and release our worries into Your capable hands.

 Help us acknowledge You as our Holy God full of goodness and mercy, as we watch You place every piece of Your plan in place.

Help us listen to You‒to hear You and obey You as we follow You.

 In Jesus’s name, Amen.

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How did your life change when you chose to live with a servant’s heart instead of a self-serving heart?

 Is it harder for you to stop, pray, release, acknowledge, watch, or listen to God?

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