Radical Forgiveness Begins with a Prayer AND a LIVE Zoom Book Launch Party Invitation

(Suggested Reading: Matthew 5:43-48, The Message)

My husband and I enjoyed a community event to honor the Reverend Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. on Monday. I’m smiling and praising God as I remember the beautifully diverse people surrounding us, standing-room-only.

As I reflected on the messages shared by the speakers, God brought to mind a woman who had sent me a private message chastising me over a year ago. She scolded me for using my writing platform to speak against systemic, institutional, and generational racism. I had responded with an invitation to pray and discuss these issues so we could better understand each other.

She then replied with a long email with a sharp and condescending tone, informing me of “all” my “wrong thinking.” She “didn’t mind me talking about celebrating diversity,” though she claimed “God doesn’t see color.” She said I needed to stop saying that the church should speak against systemic racism because “systemic racism isn’t a real thing.”

After all, she insisted, “racism ended with the Civil Rights Movement and everyone is treated the same and has equal opportunities in life now.” She ended her lesson with a list of a few famous African Americans who were “successful because they worked hard and had the same opportunities as everyone else,” which was her way of providing “proof that racism isn’t a problem now.”

When I first read her message, I got angry. My first impulse was to blast her in an email response and tell her how wrong she was about the things she claimed. I wanted to give her a point-by-point argument to prove she was wrong and I was right.

But the Holy Spirit stopped me in my tracks.

Instead, I called a friend who I knew would pray with me and offer wise counsel on how to deal with the situation.

After I read her the email, with tears flowing and my anger seething, I listened as she spoke wise words and sighed with relief as we prayed together. She recommended I ignore the email and pray for the woman but told me it was my decision to make as I prayed over the situation on my own.

After praying for days, I decided not to respond.

My words wouldn’t change the woman’s mind. She was convinced she was right, even though she was not a woman of color and could not possibly understand what she didn’t know or hadn’t experienced.

Maybe one day she would be open for a conversation, but my friend and I agreed that the woman’s tone and choice of words proved she was closed for discussions or learning opportunities at that time.

Besides, an email would not have been the best choice to communicate with her.

I thought my decision to pray for her and ignore her was wise, until I forgot to pray for her. Then, over a year later, I had to be in the same room with that woman during an event. As soon as I found out she would be attending the event, I started realizing that I had not completely forgiven the woman.

I asked God to forgive me and to help me forgive.

Then, I prayed He would bless that woman. Still, I didn’t really know if I’d really forgiven her as Christ had forgiven me . . . completely, unconditionally, and lovingly.

So, I kept on praying over the months I prepared for the trip, as I packed for the trip, as I traveled, as I got dressed for the first day of the event, as I entered the room, and as I walked up to her and said hello.

To my surprise, I felt relief, the peace of God, and an overwhelming sense of compassion toward the woman.

I continued praying this short blessing over her whenever I saw her: Lord, show her the limitless depth of Your love for her and help her love others as You love her.

I praised God when several of the speakers during our meeting spoke about the same things she had chastised me for sharing on my platform. I had no idea these topics would be on the agenda, but God did.

I prayed for her heart to be softened to the biblical truths being shared by others.

I also prayed God would soften my heart toward her and others who didn’t agree with me about these issues and any other beliefs or opinions I held, regardless of how right or biblical those beliefs and opinions.

As I prayed, the Holy Spirit led me to Jesus’ words:

“You’re familiar with the old written law, ‘Love your friend,’ and its unwritten companion, ‘Hate your enemy.’ I’m challenging that. I’m telling you to love your enemies. Let them bring out the best in you, not the worst.

When someone gives you a hard time, respond with the supple moves of prayer, for then you are working out of your true selves.

This is what God does. He gives His best ̶ the sun to warm and the rain to nourish ̶ to everyone, regardless: the good and bad, the nice and nasty.

If all you do is love the loveable, do you expect a bonus? Anybody can do that.

If you simply say hello to those who greet you, do you expect a medal? Any run-of-the-mill sinner does that.

In a word, what I’m saying is, Grow up. You’re kingdom subjects. Now live like it. Live out your God-created identity.

Live generously and graciously toward others, the way God lives toward you.” (Matthew 5:43-48, The Message).

God is still working on me, even as I type these words.

But as I practice surrendering to the Holy Spirit’s transforming love, I refuse to allow the enemy to distract me from fulfilling the Great Commission (sharing God’s truth and love to the ends of the earth) and the Greatest Commandment (loving God and others, loving my neighbors as I love myself).

As I pray for our world and for me to follow the Reverend Dr. Martin Luther King Jr’s example of loving like Jesus, I have committed to loving God and others as I share His truth and love wherever He leads me.

To love like Jesus begins with a prayer of surrender, the resolve to forgive as He has forgiven me, and a desire to stand firm on the God-breathed words of Scripture while being faithfully obedient to His Word, which is only possible through the power of the Holy Spirit.

So, as I pray for others, as I pray God will continue transforming my heart and mind, I’m trying to follow God’s leading and make the world around me a little better.

How?

I’m speaking against injustice and doing my part to reveal that, according to the Bible, systemic, institutional, and generational racism are sins that the enemy wants to use to divide and defeat us.

I’m sharing my devotional, Waiting for God: Trusting Daily in God’s Plan and Pace, with those who are weary as they trust God to work in and through their lives each day.

I’m sharing my children’s picture book, Different Like Me, now available in Spanish Diferente como yo, to help children (and some adults) celebrate our differences and our sameness as God’s beautifully and intentionally diverse and purposefully connected people.

I’ve completed two more picture books, scheduled to release in 2024, that equip and encourage readers to nurture deeper relationships with God and others while celebrating, embracing, and advocating for diversity and inclusion. Praise the Lord! Praise the Lord! I can hardly wait to share more about these books! To God be the glory!

I’m using my platform as an author and speaker to promote peace and love while working toward creating safe spaces to experience a taste of the world the Reverend Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. spoke of in his speeches, specifically “I Have a Dream.”

I’m being intentional about lifting other “Kingdom Subjects” up in Christ’s love, supporting them as God uses them for His glory.

And I am praying for you, our world, and for my heart so we can be rooted in God’s Word while growing in love with God’s beautifully diverse and purposefully connected people!

As Alan and I settle into our new community, we’re excited to see what God has in store for us.

He was recently asked to join the Solano County Black Chamber of Commerce. We’re praying he can use his God-given gifts to promote God-honoring changes in our community. Thank You, Lord!

Because we live in a world that hates God, more wounds will be inflicted, more conversations will be uncomfortable, and those lines of division will be drawn in hardened concrete instead of sand.

But, as always, love will prevail!

When I thought about that woman today after the event that honored Dr. King’s life, I thought about Dr. King’s sacrifices and his love for all people, including those who hated him. I also thought about Jesus’ sacrifices and His love for all people, including those who hated Him.

As I type these words, I am praying for the woman in the story above, any other person who has offended and hurt me in the past, and anyone who is going to offend and hurt me in the future. I am asking the Lord to help me release my offenders into His loving and merciful hands. I’m asking Him to help me to live with a heart committed to radical forgiveness, so I can forgive others as Jesus has radically forgiven me.

Radical forgiveness starts with a prayer, just like the prayer Jesus said while on the cross at Calvary.

As we pray over our current relationships and dig deeper into Scripture, we can ask the Holy Spirit to help us submit to His loving and wise counsel and empower us to rely on His life-transforming love and limitless wisdom and power.

I look forward to hearing your stories of how God is blessing you with freedom and peace, as we commit to loving like Jesus by forgiving as He forgave us!

Holy Spirit, thanks for opening our eyes to see when we’re blinded by unforgiveness. Please forgive us for not trusting You to be judge according to Your perfect will and to extend mercy whenever You want to extend mercy. Give us hearts that overflow with Your love, the love that the Reverend Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. exemplified through his life, and the love his family continues to exemplify, as we work together to bring about the changes necessary for Dr. King’s dream to become a reality.

Please remind us that You were intentional when You created Your image-bearers to be diverse and to live and love within diverse communities. Please eradicate racism from this world and from our hearts, Lord. Help us to be willing to listen to one another so we can learn from one another so we can love one another the way You love us . . . selflessly, unconditionally, and intentionally.

Please wrap us in Your supernatural peace as we walk in the freedom and joy of love, which defeats the lover of hate and dissension, the devil, and begins with our commitment to forgive as we’ve been forgiven. In Jesus’s name, Amen.

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I am so excited to invite you to a virtual book launch to celebrate the release of You Come from Greatness by Sara Chinakwe (chin-ah-kway).

You Come from Greatness is a celebration of Black history, an anthem for future generations, and a reminder for young readers to embrace their God-given worth. You will follow in the footsteps of greatness, kings and queens, doctors and dancers, poets and inventors ̶ like them, you were born to shine.”

When I first read You Come from Greatness, I was in tears. This book is everything I was looking for when my sons were growing up! This is the endorsement and review I wrote after reading Sara’s book:

In You Come from Greatness, Sara Chinakwe’s poetic prose and Ken Daley’s vibrant illustrations celebrate some of the great Black men and women who made a difference in Black History . . . American History . . . or more accurately, World History. Though written first as an affirming love letter to empower Black readers, young and older, You Come from Greatness can encourage all readers to honor past and current Black leaders, while embracing their own power and purpose as God’s intentionally designed and diverse image-bearers. You Come from Greatness is a much-needed resource that can embolden world-changers, with their identity secured in Christ, for generations to come.

– Xochitl Dixon, Our Daily Bread writer and the author of the 2021 ECPA Christian Book Award Finalist, Different Like Me and Waiting for God: Trusting Daily in God’s Plan and Pace.

Please love your neighbors by ordering your copy of You Come from Greatness and extra copies to share as gifts and to donate to local libraries, schools, and churches TODAY, and please take a few moments to write a short review on Amazon.

The more reviews Sara has, the more Amazon will help her reach more readers with this beautiful message of hope that points to God and empowers readers to DREAM BIG and be all God created them to be.

You’re invited to join us for a LIVE Zoom Book Launch Party. I’ll be serving as the moderator. We’ll have book giveaways, an exclusive Q&A with the author, and more!

Click here to join us on Saturday, January 21, 2023 at 11 am Pacific Time. 

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You can learn more about Sara and connect with her on her website at www.sarachinakwe.com today.

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To order your copies of You Come from Greatness by Sara Chinakwe, please click here!

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Xochitl Dixon is inviting you to a scheduled Zoom meeting.
Topic: You Come from Greatness – LIVE Zoom Launch Party with Sara Chinakwe
Time: Jan 21, 2023 10:45 AM Pacific Time (US and Canada)
Join Zoom Meeting
Meeting ID: 891 7234 1937
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Give the Gift of Radical Forgiveness for Christmas and a Mega-Bundle Book Giveaway!

(Suggested Reading: Luke 23:32-43)

As Christmas approaches, some of us are looking forward to holiday gatherings and some of us wish we could avoid folks in our inner circle.

Even as lights twinkle and carolers sing, some people are wrestling with unresolved conflicts. Some have given up on relationships, licking old wounds and straining their backs to adjust their grudge-sacks.

The enemy doesn’t have to work hard to divide God’s people when we do most of the legwork for him.

It is healthy to create boundaries. It’s important to accept that some relationships are not going to be . . . or should not be . . . restored. But unforgiveness disrupts peace, diminishes joy, and places us in disobedience to God.

So, how are we supposed to get right with God and celebrate Christmas if we’re struggling with unforgiveness?

I had to learn the hard way.

A few years ago, at different times in the same year, two women ended their friendship with me without giving me reasons. Though I asked them several times to tell me what I’d done to make them angry enough to end our friendship, I still have no clue.

As I grieved both friendships, I asked God to reveal what I’d done.

Through mutual friends, I found out both women had gossiped about me. I didn’t know what they said, but it didn’t matter. In that moment, I knew they weren’t really my friends.

I decided to pray for them and give them space since we didn’t have to run in the same circles very often.

But when I saw both of them at an event, I started getting mad again. That’s when God reminded me that my unforgiveness impacted my relationship with Him more than anyone else.

I found a quiet place on campus to pray for them and release them into God’s hands. I kept on praying blessings over them, every time I saw them.

Eventually, the Holy Spirit freed me from the bondage of my unforgiveness.

How did I know I was freed?

Whenever I saw those women, I felt peace and was able to be kind . . . even when they weren’t kind in return.

That freedom and peace allowed me to be ready when God blessed me with some unexpected ministry opportunities.

Though losing those friends hurt my heart, forgiving them allowed me to move forward and meet other friends as I stepped into those new ministry opportunities God provided. He’s still bringing new people into my life and blessing me with more ministry opportunities. He’s also helping me appreciate and nurture healthier relationships with old and new friends who want to be in my life.

BUT extending forgiveness, especially when the offender is not repentant, is hard . . . really hard!

It’s easy to love kind neighbors, the neighbors who agree with us, encourage us, and understand us. Who wouldn’t love neighbors who ask for forgiveness when they’re wrong and who are honest about their feelings so we can seek forgiveness when we’ve offended them?

But Jesus calls us to love all of our neighbors, including the ones who need the most grace, the ones who are as depraved and dependent on God’s mercy as we are.

No matter how many times we cry out to God, trying to justify the list of people we’ve tucked in the dark corners of our unforgiving hearts, the words He gave us in Scripture don’t change.

“What do You want me to do, Lord?”

Forgive.

But I’m angry.

Forgive.

But I’m tired of forgiving when there seems to be no remorse.

Forgive.

But I’m still hurt.

Forgive.

But I’m afraid to get hurt again.

Forgive.

In Ephesians 4, God commands us to forgive as we’ve been forgiven (v. 32).

While Jesus hung on the cross, He willingly submitted to the nails that pierced His hands and feet. He paid the insurmountable debt our wickedness earned.

During Christ’s earthly ministry, He had countless reasons to hold grudges, to become bitter, to seek revenge, to refuse to forgive . . . especially when He chose to endure the suffering on the cross.

But as He looked at the people who cheered for His execution‒those who mocked Him without remorse or repentance‒Jesus said, “Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing” (Luke 23:34, NIV).

The people Jesus asked the Father to forgive didn’t admit their wrongs or apologize.

Still, Jesus forgave.

In Total Forgiveness, R.T. Kendall states that “[asking] the Father to forgive them showed that not only had [Jesus] forgiven them and released them from their guilt, but also that He asked His Father not to punish them or take revenge on them . . .” (p. 3).

Our loving Savior intended on offering us radical forgiveness before He left His heavenly throne, put on flesh, and allowed Himself to be wrapped in swaddling cloth and placed in a manger.

When Jesus hung on the cross, bruised and bloody, He willingly paid the price for my sins . . . for your sins . . . before we could even think of repenting . . . before we even realized our need for repentance.

When we think of Jesus in the manger, we cannot forget the cost of the cross.

Jesus demonstrated selfless love and forgiveness on that cross and asks us to do the same when we’re struggling to forgive others.

So this year, would you join me in asking God to help us give the gift of radical forgiveness for Christmas?

By offering radical forgiveness, we’re not condoning, minimizing, or even forgetting an offense. God is righteous and just. He can be trusted to handle every situation.

In Scripture, He promises that we will all be held accountable for our actions, our words, and our attitudes. But He is also He full of compassion.

God understands our need to process and heal, but He still asks us to forgive so we can be in right relationship with Him.

He knows when it’s time to take someone out of our lives, most of the time for reasons we may not know or understand on this side of eternity.

He also knows what it will take to build a better relationship after we face the conflict and trust Him to heal the rifts, beginning with our willingness to obey His command to forgive as He has forgiven us.

Forgiveness–placing the offense and the offender into God’s trustworthy hands–draws us closer to God and frees us from carrying burdens that don’t belong to us.

We can trust Him to work in and through their lives as He continues working in and through our lives.

We can choose victorious freedom through right relationships with God and others, instead of insisting on being right, instead of gloating in someone else’s remorsefulness, instead of demanding apologies before forgiving.

As imperfect humans in desperate need of our Savior and Redeemer Jesus Christ, we will need to forgive others and ask for forgiveness all the days of our lives.

Radical forgiveness requires an ongoing commitment to surrender to the Holy Spirit, but begins with the choice to love Jesus and others like Jesus loves us.

Will you give the gift of radical forgiveness for Christmas this year?

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Lord, thank You for forgiving us and for empowering us to forgive. Please prepare our hearts to receive and submit to Your truth and love. Show us our wickedness and lead us into the way everlasting (Psalm 139:23-24). Help us recognize, confess, repent, and turn away from our sins. Even if the restoration of a relationship isn’t possible, help us forgive others as You’ve forgiven us so that we can experience the peace and freedom of radical forgiveness. In Jesus’ name, Amen.

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I would love to hear your story in the comment section below. I’m praying for us!

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BOOK GIVEAWAY!

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I’m one of 16 Christian authors participating in the 2022 Giving Hope for the Holidays Mega-Bundle Book Giveaway!

To ENTER for your chance to receive these 25 Hope-Giving Books, please visit my Instagram page today.

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Here is the list of the 16 authors AND the 25 books we’re giving away:

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You Are: Speaking God’s Word Over Your Children and Chosen: Claiming Your Kingdom Purpose, board books by Emily Assell, founder of Generation Claimed at @generationclaimed

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HUES of You: An Activity Book for Learning About the Skin You are In by Dr. Lucretia Berry, founder of Brownicity at @lucretiaberry

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Jack vs the Tornado and The Hunt for Fang, middle grade novels by Amanda Cleary Eastep at @book_leaves

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Different Like Me, a 2021 ECPA Christian Children’s Picture Book Finalist, and Waiting for God: Trusting Daily in God’s Plan and Pace, a 31-day devotional by Xochitl Dixon at @xochitl.e.dixon

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Simply Christmas: A Busy Mom’s Guide to Reclaiming the Peace of the Holidays, a devotional by Tama Fortner at @tamafortnerbooks

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Cora Cooks Pancit, a children’s picture book, and Walk, Run, Soar: A 52-Week Running Devotional by Dorina Gilmore-Young and Shawn Young at @dorinagilmore

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TAMAR: Rediscovering the God Who Redeems Me, a Bible Study by Shadia Hrichi at @shadiahrichi

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Sweet Tea for the Soul: Down-Home Devotions to Comfort the Heart (Sequel to From Grits to Grace), a devotional by Linda Kozar at @lindakozar

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The Complete Guide to the Prayers of Jesus: What Jesus Prayed and How It Will Change Your Life Today, a nonfiction book by Janet McHenry at @janetmchenry

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Far from Home: Discovering Your Identity as Foreigners on Earth, a nonfiction book by Mabel Ninan at @mabel_ninan

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Navigating the Blues: Where to Turn When Worry, Anxiety, or Depression Steals Your Hope, a 90-day devotional by Katara Patton at @katarawp **Scheduled for release on January 3, 2023.**

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Walking in Tall Weeds and A Long Time Comin’, Contemporary Southern fiction by Robin W. Pearson at @robinwpearson

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God’s Beloved Community (Children’s Picture Book), and Color-Courageous Discipleship (Discipleship for Adults), and Color-Courageous Discipleship Student Edition (Discipleship for Youth/Teens) by Michelle Sanchez at @michelle_t_sanchez

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5-Minute Devotions for Teens: A Guide to God and Mental Health and Restore My Soul: The Power and Promise of 30 Psalms by Laura Smith at @laurasmithauthor

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This Life We Share: 52 Reflections on Journeying Well with God and Others and Life is Sweet, Y’all: Wit and Wisdom with a Side of Sass (inspirational gift book with southern humor and recipes) by Maggie Wallem Rowe at @maggiewallemrowe

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Brown Baby Jesus, a children’s picture book by Dorena Williamson at @dorenawilliamson

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On Monday, December 19, 2022 at 8 am Pacific, we’ll announce the randomly selected recipient of these 25 Christian books on Instagram.

TO BE ELIGIBLE TO ENTER this mega-bundle book giveaway, you MUST LIVE IN the Continental U.S.

The 2022 Giving Hope for the Holidays Mega-Bundle Book Giveaway is in no way sponsored, endorsed, administered by, or associated with Instagram or any other organization.

Thanks for joining the FUN!

Merry Christmas!

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Committing to Truly Loving and Following Jesus

As I watch the divisions in the United States and within the Church widen, I cry out to the Lord.

My personal problems seem so small as I weep for the Church, asking God to reveal my wickedness, to purify my heart and mind so I can live in alignment with His life-transforming truth and love.

Still, I’m wrestling with God as I witness hate infesting communities and dividing people.

I watch in disbelief as well-known Christian leaders, blinded by idolatry, add checkmarks on evil’s scorecard by condoning, excusing, minimizing, and contributing to the sins that make folks want to run from Jesus instead of to Him.

I don’t want to drive people away from Jesus.

I don’t want to stray from Jesus, either.

So, I began to ask God a simple question:

How can I truly love and follow Jesus?

My search led me back to the basics.

“Whoever claims to love God yet hates a brother or sister is a liar. For whoever does not love their brother and sister, whom they have seen, cannot love God, whom they have not seen.” (1 John 4:20)

Jesus Himself said that loving Him is synonymous to obeying Him (John 14:15). He clearly declares the theme of love with the greatest commandment, too:

“Love the Lord your God with all you heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ All the Law and the Prophets hang on these two commandments.” (Matthew 22:37-40)

As I studied Scripture, I began to realize that truly loving and following Jesus results in the Spirit-empowered obedience to sacrificially love our neighbors as we love ourselves.

Selfless and sacrificial love protects “our neighbors,” all the people God created and loves, more fiercely than we protect our earthly rights, our biased opinions, our political beliefs and affiliations, our traditions, and our need to be right instead of being right with God.

Christ followers cannot love sacrificially or selflessly if we’re content with cowering in the dark corners of our comfort zones, hiding behind apathy, indifference, or approval through silence to avoid conflict or criticism.

In the parable of the Good Samaritan (Luke 10:25-37), Jesus commends the Good Samaritan for having mercy on his fellow man and commands His disciples to “go and do likewise” (v. 37).

Oh, Lord. Forgive me! Change me and make me more like You, merciful Jesus.

How often have I chosen the sin of indifference, refusing to love someone with my words, actions, thoughts, and attitudes?

How often have I chosen the sin of idolatry, placing myself above You and everyone else?

The more I studied the Bible, the more I discovered God’s repeated emphasis on loving our neighbors as a commandment not an option:

“If you really keep the royal law found in Scripture, ‘Love your neighbor as yourself,’ you are doing right. But if you show favoritism, you sin and are convicted by the law as lawbreakers.” (James 2:8-9)

When we choose to truly love and follow Jesus, we can begin a wave of healing that ripples through our homes and into our communities, in person and online.

We may not experience physical restoration of a relationship or guarantee an offender’s change of heart when we’re the ones forgiving and choosing to love, but we can rely on God’s just and merciful love to work in and through the most painful circumstances.

Though the road toward change and healing will not be easy or short, our mission as Christ followers is clear.

If we say we love Jesus, we are commanded to love all people as Jesus loves us ̶ selflessly and sacrificially ̶ because He first loved us (1 John 4:19).

As we live for Jesus and love like Jesus, we can draw people to the hope we have in Christ and make disciples of all nations by being true examples of disciples of Christ (Matthew 28:16-20).

Love will always prevail because our victorious God Himself is love.

But as I cry out to Jesus today, I’m praying He’ll change my heart and transform my thinking so that I can prevail by living a victorious life in Christ ̶ truly loving and following Jesus, which will be evident in the ways I love others who are different from me, who believe differently than me, and even those who refuse to love me back.

What a glorious day it will be when God uses our loving obedience, our genuine and selfless love for Him and others, to draw others closer to Him, to inspire others to dig deeper into His Word, and to encourage others to delight in His love as they enter into His eternal Kingdom!

Hallelujah!

Lord, thank You for loving us, forgiving us, and empowering us to love and forgive others. As we watch the atrocities unfolding right before our eyes and grieve over the blatant hatred destroying lives, it is ever apparent that we need You, Lord.

Please reveal our wickedness so we can repent, turn away from our sins, and represent You while living as foreigners on this earth.

Help us place offenders in Your hands, so that we can be freed to make a difference in our world by refusing to be indifferent.

As we rest in the surety of Your constant presence, give us all we need to seek peace, celebrate diversity as we stand in unity, and love selflessly, sacrificially, and generously all the days of our lives, starting today.

 In Jesus’s name, Amen.

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Who, besides Jesus, loved you into the Kingdom of God?

The Lord used so many people to love me as He prepared my heart to surrender to Him. However, I would like to thank Ms. Virginia, Winona, Barbara P., Cendy, and Miriam for loving me like Jesus before I’d even seen a “real Bible,” and while I was deliberately unloving and unlovable.

Who is God asking you to love into His Kingdom as you share the Gospel with them?

How are you loving Jesus by loving others in the against injustice?

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As I seek to fall head over heels in love with Jesus more and more each day, I am reading through the Bible in a year with the Our Daily Bread reading schedule. If you would like to join me, please let me know in the comments section or send me a message.

For more biblical encouragement, please subscribe to my YouTube channel.

Please join me in loving our littlest neighbors by ordering extra copies of Different Like Me to share as gifts today.

I would appreciate your help spreading the word about Different Like Me, too.

One easy way to make a huge impact is by writing a short review on Amazon today. All you have to do is share what you like about the book and if you would recommend the book to other readers.

I look forward to being rooted in God’s Word as we grow closer to God’s people together!

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Give the Gift of Radical Forgiveness for Christmas

(Suggested Reading: Luke 23:32-43)

As Christmas approaches and our world continues seeking some sense of normalcy during this pandemic, some people are not social distancing from family because of the virus. Some are grieving over unresolved family conflicts. Some have given up on broken relationships long before the pandemic. And some are licking their wounds and widening divisions over differing opinions on masks, politics, and tension caused by racism and an idolatrous sense of nationalism.

Instead of singing carols about Jesus’ birth, some are crushing hearts with careless words and graphics shared on social media.

Not many of us can escape the crossfire.

The enemy doesn’t have to work hard to divide God’s people when we do most of the legwork work for him.

As I prayerfully prepared to write this Christmas article multiple times, I couldn’t get past the first paragraph. After a few personal attacks I endured over the last year , I’d allowed resentment and bitterness to take root in my heart.

How could I write about celebrating the birth of Christ if I couldn’t obey the Greatest Commandment ̶ to love God and to love my neighbor as I love myself?

The Bible clearly explains God’s command to love our neighbors includes all people who are created in His image no matter what their beliefs, differences, or sins.

When I truly love my neighbors, I’ll treat them as Jesus would treat them.

It’s easy to love the kind neighbors, the neighbors who agree with me, who encourage me, who understand me, who stick up for me, who don’t rub me the wrong way.

But Jesus calls me to love the neighbors who need the most grace, the neighbors who are as depraved and dependent on God’s mercy as I am.

How can I do this if I allow pride and hurt to fester until gaps of resentment, bitterness, and unforgiveness feel too wide and too deep to repair?

I cried out to God, trying to justify the list of people I had tucked in the dark corners of my unforgiving heart. “What do You want me to do, Lord?”

Forgive.

But I’m angry.

Forgive.

But I’m tired of forgiving when there seems to be no remorse, no repentance, no willingness to listen to learn or even empathize.

Forgive.

But I’m still hurt.

Forgive.

But I’m afraid to get hurt again.

Forgive.

As I wrestled with God, He reminded me of the countless times He’d extended undeserved mercy toward me and led me to Luke 23:32-43.

While Jesus hung on the cross, He willingly submitted to the nails that pierced His hands and feet. As an atonement for my sins, He paid the insurmountable debt my wickedness earned.

What does this have to do with Christmas?

Our loving Savior intended on offering us radical forgiveness before He left His heavenly throne, put on flesh, and allowed Himself to be wrapped in swaddling cloth and placed in a manger.

During Christ’s earthly ministry, He had countless reasons to hold grudges, to become bitter, to seek revenge, to refuse to forgive . . . especially when He chose to endure the suffering on the cross.

But as He looked on the ones who cheered for His execution‒those who mocked the King of Kings without remorse or repentance‒Jesus said, “Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing” (Luke 23:34, NIV).

The ones Jesus loved, the ones Jesus asked the Father to forgive weren’t remorseful . . . at all.

In Total Forgiveness, R.T. Kendall states that “[asking] the Father to forgive them showed that not only had [Jesus] forgiven them and released them from their guilt, but also that He asked His Father not to punish them or take revenge on them . . .” (p. 3).

Though I’ve read this book over half a dozen times and have read through the Bible yearly since 2005, I still choke up when I consider the words Jesus cried out while hanging, bruised and bloody, on the cross . . . paying the price for my sins.

Am I truly willing to love with such selflessness?

Are you?

When we think of Jesus in the manger, we cannot forget Jesus on the cross.

 So this year, would you join me in asking God to help us give the gift of radical forgiveness for Christmas?

No more pleas for payback.

No more daydreams of dishing out a cold bowl of revenge.

No more harboring resentment.

When we ask God to help us release our offenders into His loving and merciful hands, we can trust Him to work in and through their lives as He continues working in and through our lives.

The more we pray blessings over our offenders, the more God helps us see them through His eyes of loving grace . . . and the more peace reigns in our hearts.

When we offer radical forgiveness, we’re not condoning, minimizing, or even forgetting an offense. God is righteous and just. He is full of compassion and understands our need to process, heal, and sometimes close the door on a relationship.

But when we place the offense and the offender into God’s trustworthy hands, we no longer have to carry burdens that don’t belong to us.

We can choose victorious freedom through right relationships with God and others instead of insisting on being right, gloating in someone else’s remorsefulness, or demanding apologies before forgiving.

As imperfect humans in desperate need of our Savior and Redeemer Jesus Christ, we will need to forgive others and ask for forgiveness all the days of our lives. We’ll need prayer and encouragement every step of the way.

Radical forgiveness requires an ongoing commitment to surrender to the Holy Spirit but begins with the choice to love Jesus and love others like Jesus loves us.

Will you give the gift of radical forgiveness for Christmas this year?

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Lord, thank You for forgiving us and for empowering us to forgive. Please prepare our hearts to receive and submit to Your truth and love. Show us our wickedness and lead us into the way everlasting (Psalm 139:23-24). Help us recognize, confess, repent, and turn away from our sins. Please help us reconcile, even if restoration of a relationship isn’t possible, as we embrace the peace and freedom of living in radical forgiveness. In Jesus’ name, Amen.

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I ordered a revised and updated copy of Total Forgiveness by R.T. Kendall, a book God has used to help me understand what forgiveness is and isn’t, as well as what He says about forgiveness in the Bible.

I’ll be reading Total Forgiveness as I read through the Bible in a year with the Our Daily Bread Ministries reading schedule, which is posted with each day’s devotion starting on January 1, 2021.

Please let me know if you are going to join me in reading Total Forgiveness and/or if you are going to join me in reading through the Bible in 2021, which only take 15 minutes per day (30-45 minutes if you read slow like me).

I look forward to growing with you!

Merry Christmas!

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To inhale God’s truth, exhale prayers and praises, and rest in God’s presence, please join me for Pause for Prayer: Thriving through the Wait by subscribing to my new YouTube Channel today.

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Honoring God When Loving Family Ain’t Easy

MEME - Genesis 45 v 8 - Jan 22, 2018 Blog Post - Honoring God When Loving Family Ain't Easy

Note to Reader: My heart aches for those of us who have been wounded by the sins of abusive family members. Please note I’m not referring to abuse when referencing conflicts or wounds caused by family members in this article. If you or someone you love is suffering abuse of any kind, please contact a professional and seek help immediately. I am praying for you as I write this note. You are not alone.

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Honoring God When Loving Family Ain’t Easy

While some folks enjoy healthy and holy communication within godly familial relationships, some of us endure more than our fair share of seemingly endless family drama.

Too many of us are grieving over estranged relatives or heartbroken watching loved ones reject family as they battle addictions.

A few are tired of those who blame others instead of taking responsibility for their poor life choices. Some struggle with family members who instigate arguments, shame or belittle, hold grudges, judge harshly, or gossip.

Family members mock or persecute us because of our faith. Some have lied to us or about us, stolen from us, cheated us, and some have even verbally, emotionally, or physically abused us. (Please see Reader’s Note at the beginning of this article.)

How are we supposed to respond to folks who exaggerate or deceive to prevent others from knowing who they really are or what they’ve really done to us or others we love?

But wait . . . what if some of us are the people I’ve just described . . . or have been that person in the past?

What if we’re the ones who need to seek forgiveness and ask God to change us and help us make amends and work toward restoring or renewing relationships with those we’ve hurt in the past?

The fact is, it just ain’t easy honoring God when we realize we’re all imperfect people who have a tough time loving our kin or being lovable ourselves.

Over the last couple of years, the Lord brought me through some heartbreaking relational conflicts. I wrote a six-part series entitled “Radical Forgiveness” as I prayed over broken or barely surviving relationships with family members. As of today, I have continued praying over several of those still-broken relationships.

Family strife is a fact of life that we don’t have to allow to steal our joy or destroy the genuinely loving relationships we can experience with God and others.

It’s tempting to get stuck on the merry-go-round-of-complaints, get caught up in being angry, get even, or get as far from the drama as humanly possible. Instead, we can take a closer look at how God worked in and through familial discord in Scripture to help His faithful servants thrive despite family strife.

In Genesis, we see how Jacob favoring Joseph caused his other sons to hate their younger brother (Genesis 37:3-4), so much that they sold him into slavery (v. 28). They even lied to their father for years (vv. 34-36).

God remained with Joseph and blessed his life (Genesis 39:2-6). Though he wasn’t exempt from more painful trials or injustice (vv. 9, 11-20), the “LORD was with Joseph and showed him steadfast love” (v. 21). Whatever Joseph did, “the LORD made it succeed” (v. 23).

Instead of allowing his experiences to taint his attitude or shake his faith, Joseph honored God by living with integrity and treating others with love, compassion, and kindness (vv. 6-7).

Two years of being wrongly imprisoned didn’t stop Joseph from glorifying God (Genesis 41:14, 16). Rejoicing over the family the Lord gave him through marriage, Joseph proclaimed, “God has made me forget all my hardship and all my father’s house” (v. 51).

Joseph was happy. What could possibly go wrong?

Well . . . those scoundrels who sold him into slavery showed up. For the first time in years, Joseph stood face-to-face with the strangers he recognized as the brothers who betrayed him and his father. Though Joseph wasn’t upfront with his siblings when they came begging for help, he didn’t fake forgiveness either.

God gave him time to process his emotions (Genesis 42-44). Even though Joseph had plenty of reasons to be mad, he didn’t cast blame, hold a grudge, run to Pharaoh and gossip about his brothers, or demand punishment.

Joseph accepted how God had caused him to thrive despite his suffering. He didn’t waste time trying to prove to the world that his brothers were wrong for what they’d done.

Instead, Joseph trusted that the Lord had remained in control and stayed with him through everything that had happened in his life (Genesis 45:5-9). He knew from experience God could bring good out of painful circumstances (Genesis 50:20). So, Joseph didn’t fear extending grace, or being generous in love and kindness (v. 21).

As we deal with challenging familial relationships, God can empower us to surrender to His mercy, live in the freedom of forgiveness, and love others as selflessly as He loves us.

God will stay with us, protect our reputations, guide our steps according to His perfect will, and enable us to experience peace and joy as we choose to honor Him . . . even when others do not.

Unfortunately, since we’re all imperfect people who live in a fallen world, family members will hurt us and we’ll hurt those we love. But we can protect our mental, emotional, and spiritual health by placing our trust in the Lord.

We can ask Him to help us make time to process our feelings, remain calm, and be courageously and respectfully honest with Him and others.

We can ask God to help us create and respect healthy and holy boundaries, as we honor Him with our words, attitudes, thoughts, and actions.

We can trust the Lord to give us all we need to keep on praying for and working toward building stronger familial relationships.

And we can thrive as we honor Him . . . even if our closest family relationships end up being connected through Christ’s blood (The Church) instead of our genealogy.

Father God, thanks for helping us honor You in the ways we love others in healthy and holy ways. Though sometimes it’s unsafe, unhealthy, or unwise to restore a broken familial relationship, please help us trust we’re all in Your hands as we choose to forgive and pray we will all be forever changed by Your love and grace. In Jesus’s name, Amen.

How can we benefit from extending forgiveness to someone who doesn’t apologize?

How does it help to know forgiveness doesn’t mean excusing, ignoring, justifying, or minimizing sin?

How does it help to know reconciliation doesn’t require us to pretend things are fine or the same as before (restoration), or better than ever (renewal)?

How can we honor God when we can only show love from afar, because a familial relationship is reconciled through forgiveness on our part, but not physically or emotionally restored?

How can we honor God and love family members who do not want a relationship with us?

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Radical Forgiveness Series

Part 1: Radical Forgiveness Begins with a Prayer (July 7, 2017)

Part 2: Radical Forgiveness is Loving Obedience to God (July 15, 2017)

Part 3: Radical Forgiveness Frees Innocent Victims (July 24, 2017)

Part 4: Radical Forgiveness is Possible (August 5, 2017)

Part 5: Radical Forgiveness Diminishes the Power of Hate (August 14, 2017)

Part 6: Radical Forgiveness Requires Us to Accept God’s Forgiveness First (August 23, 2017)

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