In November 2023, my husband and I invited our pastor and his wife to a fundraising event sponsored by an organization my husband was affiliated with at the time. They had recently moved from Texas so we were hoping to introduce them to people in our community.
However, on Wednesday, November 29, 2023, the president of that organization denied my service dog public access to that event, a Gala scheduled to be held at the Meritage Resort and Spa on Saturday, December 2nd in Napa, California.
I figured she must have made a mistake. Service dogs are considered medical equipment according to the Americans with Disabilities Act. So, I sent the president an email requesting a Zoom meeting and a copy of the “laws” she claimed gave her the right to deny my service dog access to the public event.
I hoped we could clear up the misunderstanding, so my husband and I could enjoy a wonderful night of fellowship with our pastor, his wife, and our community.
Nothing could have prepared me for the president’s emailed response, in which she copied multiple board members and used all caps and unprofessional language.
I wrestled with sorrow and anger as I read her disrespectful criticism about my caregiver, my husband of thirty years and her elected treasurer of the board. I grappled with grief and resentment over her dismissive comments about my service dog and her demeaning remarks regarding my disability.
I feared I couldn’t respond without disrespecting Jesus and ruining my witness for Christ, so I prayed and chose not to respond.
But I planned on attending the Gala with my service dog.
The president, however, persisted in demanding my husband confirm that we would leave my service dog in a kennel during the Gala. She gave us an ultimatum. If we didn’t confirm by noon on Friday, December 1, 2023, she would refund the money for all four of our tickets.
As soon as the clock struck noon on December 1st, she followed through on her threat.
I was on the phone with the ADA Specialist, who affirmed that the president of the chamber had violated my civil rights by invalidating my tickets. She encouraged me to file a complaint with the Department of Justice and seek legal counsel.
As I prayed, grief mingled with anger. I couldn’t figure out why I felt compassion for a woman who had clearly discriminated against me.
I fell asleep with a debilitating headache.
When I woke up, the Holy Spirit had given me a vision of brambles dripping with blood and the title for my next teaching series, “Choosing Love in the Brambles.”
Brambles are thorny plants, often used in medieval art to symbolize sorrow, bitterness, sin, death, and even the fallen state of mankind.
Unsure of why God gave me that image or that title at the time, I continued praying for clarity and asked my accountability partners to join me in praying for the president, the organization, and for me as I processed my mixed emotions.
By the power of the Holy Spirit and with the help of my accountability partners, I prayed for the president’s salvation. I asked God to help me forgive her . . . because Jesus had forgiven me . . . and to help me love her . . . because He loves me.
When Alan and I called our pastor and his wife so we could pray together on Saturday morning, I asked God to redeem our evening.
While we were being excluded from the chamber’s Gala event at Napa’s Meritage Resort and Spa (not by the hotel management but by one of its patrons), we enjoyed a wonderful meal at Morimoto, a restaurant in the same town.
The manager and staff welcomed all of us. We weren’t surprised. We’ve never had any issues with my service dog at any professional establishment or with any professional community leaders.
I told our kind waitress that we’d been denied public access across town, then offered her a copy of my book Different Like Me for her son.
She teared up and said she was sorry about what had happened to us. Then, she accepted my gift and shared that her son had asked to be baptized a few days before!
I wrote a prayer and a message of encouragement inside the front page when I gave her a copy of my devotional, Waiting for God: Trusting Daily in God’s Plan and Pace.
Even while the president was dancing in her fancy dress in a crowd of people who had no idea (except for the other chamber board members) that she had just discriminated against me and my service dog . . . even while justice was not being served.
God was being glorified because . . . Callie was doing her job as I served God in that Michelon Star restaurant WHILE being discriminated against by the woman who was sponsoring the Gala event across town!
That ministry moment right smack in the middle of my affliction was a hidden treasure in a secret place.
To God be the glory, the honor, and the praise!
The Holy Spirit kept nudging me to stand up against the injustice as an advocate for myself and others.
So, on December 7, 2023, I filed a complaint with the Department of Justice. A week later, however, the DOJ informed me that they had too many complaints filed and not enough resources to follow up on every violation. They encouraged me to seek legal counsel.
After a month of prayer while seeking wise counsel, I saw no justice served while receiving no help from anyone I reached out to for help.
The injustice overwhelmed me.
As I was praying on a Saturday morning, the Holy Spirit nudged me to call the president of the organization and ask her to talk to me. I was shocked, but praised God, when she agreed to speak respectfully with me.
I prayed silently, asking the Holy Spirit to keep my voice calm, and shared honestly about the law and my hopes for healing and reconciliation so we could help our community learn more about disability awareness and access laws. Then, I invited her to speak.
She did not use a calm or respectful tone when she said she was “not sorry” and that she would not do anything differently.
After acknowledging Callie was a legitimate service dog, she said we were both welcome at all the chamber events throughout the year except the end of year Gala, which she felt was not an appropriate venue for “pets.”
This is how I discovered why people get away with discrimination against disabled people.
Some offenses can be avoided once people understand the laws.
However, there is no legal organization that will mediate between two parties to help them work out disagreements about the laws.
And when people don’t agree . . . the only way to move forward in peace without going to court is to agree to disagree.
When this woman refused to apologize and take responsibility for her actions, I knew I could not change her mind. I didn’t want to hurt the organization and the other businesses associated with it because of her poor leadership, so I chose Love, with a capital “L.”
I chose God ̶ who is Love (1 John 4:8) ̶ the only one who CAN transform hearts and minds.
I chose God’s way, the way of the peacemaker, in the face of injustice as I walked through the twisted and bloodied thorns of the brambles.
I told the president that I thought she was wrong regarding her interpretation of the law and her description of public events versus private events. She said she was fine with that.
I said I would be willing to agree to respect one another’s right to disagree so that we could move forward peace.
She said she was okay with that.
I also told her that I had forgiven her because Jesus had forgiven me, and that I would continue praying for her and the organization, only because I supported the purpose for which the organization was founded upon.
She didn’t even respond to that, but she did agree to support a training workshop to help our community learn more about service dogs and ADA Laws. She agreed it would be valuable to share our experience about disagreeing about the interpretation of the law.
Then, she said she was fine with me praying before we ended our conversation. I hung up the phone praising God and feeling a bit hopeful for our community.
So, I couldn’t explain why my heart felt heavy.
God soon revealed the reason behind my unsettled feeling.
Later, my husband received an email from the president informing him that she had removed him from his elected position as treasurer of the board, an act which went against the bylaws established by the organization. Since there is no governing board above her and the other board members are silent, there is no one holding her accountable for her abuse of power.
We no longer support this organization or any programs they sponsor.
Though on the surface it may look like injustice prevailed in these situations, in the end my husband and I know Christ prevails.
However, before I was able to move forward, the experience triggered a bout with situational depression that threw me into an identity crisis I had to work out with Jesus. I wrote an article about this on the God Hears Her blog entitled, “Remembering Who We Are.”
With the help of my doctor and my prayer partners, I used the resources and skills I’d learned over the years to work through my mixed feelings. As I picked through my raw emotions and struggled to choose love in the brambles, however, God led me to a passage in Lamentations 3.
I needed to lament, to release my grief . . . even though I couldn’t explain the depth of my heartache at that time. I needed to cry out to God . . . even when I didn’t understand my why I was feeling what I was feeling.
I needed to trust that God’s mercy was enough to carry me, while living in a fallen world where justice will not always be a part of the equation.
I needed to trust God to deal with injustice His way and in His time when the worldly systems failed me.
The prophet Jeremiah said, “I will never forget this awful time, as I grieve over my loss. Yet I still dare to hope when I remember this: The faithful love of the LORD never ends! His mercies never cease.” (Lamentations 3:20-22, NLT)
Jeremiah led God’s people to the truth they needed to hear: God’s unending love and mercy are enough to fuel life-giving hope.
The New International Version says: “Because of the Lord’s great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness.” (Lamentations 3:20-23).
God’s people are not destroyed by life’s turmoil, injustice, and grief because of His unending faithfulness.
God’s moment-by-moment acts of loving mercy give us enough to be enough for that moment when we aren’t sure how we can possibly take one more blow, one more step, one more breath.
Jeremiah proclaimed, “I say to myself, ‘The Lord is my portion; therefore I will wait for him.’ The Lord is good to those whose hope is in him, to the one who seeks him; it is good to wait quietly for the salvation of the Lord.” (Lamentations 3:24-26, NIV)
God is all-knowing (1 John 3:20). He has ordained every step we take (Psalm 37:23-24). He plans all our days before one of them came to be (Psalm 139:16).
So, I am certain that He knew Callie and I would be denied public access a few months before What Color is God’s Love? would be released.
I’m grateful that He had me spend time researching Bible verses about His character for a year prior to this incident. He knew I would need the truth statements I used for each color when I was recovering from the blow of being told I wasn’t allowed to share the same space as other human beings because of my disability.
God knew that I would struggle to choose Love in the brambles.
God also knew that I would need to know I was loved completely by Him, so that I could choose love instead of hate, forgiveness instead of resentment and bitterness.
He knew I would need to be secure in His great love, so I would not be consumed or utterly destroyed by my sin or anyone else’s sins against me.
Why?
Because God’s compassions never fail!
Hallelujah!
God is so good! And He has already been redeeming my experience ̶ being denied public access with my service dog ̶ by blessing me with hidden treasures in secret places, ministry opportunities in unexpected spaces AND ministry expansion.
As I prepare for the release of What Color is God’s Love? in March, I’ve also been blessed to serve as one of the contributing writers for Tyndale’s Go Bible for Kids, which releases in September. Hallelujah!
By God’s incredible grace, WaterBrook is also releasing my third picture book earlier than expected. Wonderfully, Marvelously Brown is available for pre-order NOW and will be in readers’ hands in October!
Our Daily Bread Publishing is refreshing the cover of Waiting for God and giving me a new subtitle, just in time for the release of my second ODBM devotional in early 2025. I can’t share details about my second ODBM devotional title yet, but I can hardly wait to share what God did during that journey. The testimonies of the people I interviewed made me want to know God more, love God more, and serve God more!
But I know I can do nothing without Him or YOUR HELP!
So I am asking you to partner with me in ministry today. How?
- Pray for Callie the Service Dog and me at least once a week or once a month, as I trust God to send me more opportunities to serve Him as a writer and speaker.
- Love your neighbors by pre-ordering extra copies of What Color is God’s Love? to share as gifts today, using the exclusive access link (below)!
- Share the exclusive access link (below) with your family members and friends and ask them to pre-order What Color is Love? today, too!
- After you receive your copy of What Color is God’s Love?, write a review on Amazon and any other review platforms you enjoy. Please try to write your review within the first week after receiving your book. Reviews help me reach new readers. My goal is to have 500 reviews in the first 3 months after the release of What Color is God’s Love? and I can’t do this without your prayers or your help! To God be the glory!
- Share FUN and COLORFUL pictures of you enjoying your copy of What Color is God’s Love? on Facebook and Instagram and tag me @xochitl.e.dixon so I can celebrate with you!
- Keep connecting with me here and on social media, because God has more surprises in store for us! He’s got more ministry opportunities He’s sending my way. I received two calls last week from editors asking me to pray about potential projects. To God ALONE be the glory, the honor, and the praise!
Thanks for making a difference in my life and for serving Jesus with me in these special ways.
I’m excited to see what hidden treasures in secret places He has in store for us as we continue sharing His truth and love wherever He sends us!
Hallelujah!
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Scroll down for YOUR EXCLUSIVE ACCESS LINK for What Color is God’s Love? so you can pre-order your copies today!
What are readers saying about What Color is God’s Love? in their reviews?
In September 2023, Publishers Weekly said: “Xochitl Dixon writes a rhyming tale of the rainbow as a way to explore the full spectrum of God in What Color is God’s Love? (WaterBrook, Mar. 2024)”
In What Color is God’s Love?, a little girl and her service dog join their diverse friends as they celebrate the spectacular spectrum of colors God designed. Each color invites readers to explore their God-given emotions, becomes a reminder of God’s unchanging character, and empowers children, with and without disabilities, to play, work, and serve God together, by simply letting the colors of His love shine in and through them.
Love your neighbors by pre-ordering extra copies of What Color is God’s Love? as gifts today using this exclusive link sponsored by WaterBrook and Multnomah Kids Publishing:
https://www.penguinrandomhouse.com/books/711471/what-color-is-gods-love-by-xochitl-dixon-illustrated-by-darshika-varma/
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And . . . drumroll, please . . . help me celebrate God’s abounding love as I rejoice in how He brought about my third picture book, Wonderfully, Marvelously Brown, which will release in October 2024.
Wonderfully, Marvelously Brown is a love-offering inspired by my struggles with hating my light complexion because I was teased for being so light as a kid, and a conversation with one of my granddaughters who was struggling after being teased for her beautiful darker brown complexion.
I explained melanin to her by saying, “God chose one color when He made skin for His image-bearers ̶ BROWN ̶ but He chose to make us beautifully different shades of brown, from very light to very dark! So, we are all wonderfully, marvelously brown!”
Then, I told her I would write a book about this truth and dedicate it to her.
You can love your neighbors by pre-ordering extra copies of Wonderfully, Marvelously Brown today, by using this exclusive access link:
https://www.penguinrandomhouse.com/books/711470/wonderfully-marvelously-brown-by-xochitl-dixon-illustrated-by-sara-palacios/
Please share that link with others, too!
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Thanks for all you’ve done to help us place Different Like Me into the hands of readers around the world!
Different Like Me has been helping readers celebrate our differences and our sameness as God’s beautifully diverse and purposefully connected image-bearers.
Published by Our Daily Bread Ministries in 2020, Different Like Me was nominated as the 2021 ECPA Christian Book Award Children’s Book Finalist and translated into Simplified Chinese and Dutch. In 2022, I helped translate Different Like Me into Diferente como yo!
To God be the glory, the honor, and the praise!
Translating rhyme into Spanish was way harder than I expected and a task I couldn’t do without lots of help, especially since I am not as proficient in Spanish as I would like to be. As of January 2024, Different Like Me is now available in Hong Kong! Hallelujah!
These translations, as well as the ministry work done through Our Daily Bread each month, are answers to prayers I first let drop as tears into my Bible in 2001. He is using my words to allow me to serve as a missionary! Hallelujah!
Please join me in this amazing armchair missionary outreach!
If you don’t know a child you can bless with a copy of Different Like Me or Diferente como yo, you can donate copies to your local library, school, or afterschool program, on behalf of Callie the Service Dog.
Love your neighbors and Different Like Me or Diferente como yo by clicking HERE!
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Pause for Prayer is BACK! Hallelujah!
This month, I had the privilege of interviewing Sara Chinakwe and Chioma, the most adorable guest I’ve ever had on Pause for Prayer.
Sara Chinakwe is a wife, mother, teacher, and children’s ministry leader. She encourages women and children to pursue God’s purpose and embrace their God-given identity. Sara’s deep love for teaching and decade’s long career in education was shaped in California State University Stanislaus.
In this interview, Sara shares how God helped her through a personal journey of discovering her own ancestry as she wrote You Come from Greatness, a celebration of Black History and an invitation to rejoice in being made in the image of Christ!
To watch my Pause for Prayer Interview with Sara Chinakwe and Chioma, please click here.
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Here are a few of my favorite Black children’s book authors who are creating beautiful Christian books, resources, and programs.
Please pray for and support Natasha Tripplett, Dorena Williamson, Trillia Newbell, Dr. Lucretia Berry (founder of Brownicity), and Sara Chinakwe.
I’ve worked Dorena, Dr. Berry and Sara closely for years. Natasha is a fellow Redbud Writers Guild Sister, who lives in the Bay Area so I’ll be getting to know soon! And Trillia Newbell is one of my favorite Bible teachers and children’s book authors, who I have learned from (from afar) and would love to meet!
I thank God for the work these phenomenal women of God are doing to ensure my grandbabies see themselves represented in children’s books and resources.
However, I am even more grateful for the work they do that draws readers closer to Jesus!
Thanks for helping me celebrate Black History Month in a tangible way by showing support for Black Children’s Book Authors.
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I hope you know how much I need and thank God for your ongoing partnership in ministry!
I am committed to fulfilling the Great Commission while living out the Greatest Commandment, celebrating God’s beautifully diverse image-bearers and advocating for disability awareness around the world.
But I can’t do anything without God or your ongoing prayers and practical help.
Thanks for making a difference in my life and for making a Kingdom impact as you serve alongside me in this special way.
To God be the glory, the honor, and the praise!
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